Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Being a Man

Just as Hercules had to complete his labors in order to be at peace, there are certain tasks that must be completed by a guy in order for him to call himself a man. Many tasks involve the sacred symbol of manliness-- the automobile.

Change a flat - check
Jump start a dead battery - check
Change a dead battery in the rain and the dark with the manliest of flashlights, the Maglite, with only one wrench and a brand new DIEHARD 12 volt - CHECK

Mr. Pat M and I completed this last task successfully and in a timely manner with the raging Hackensack River at our backs and the raw, biting wind in our faces. God showered some mercy upon us by cutting back on the torrential rain that had been consuming the entire east coast all day leaving us only the shoe-suctioning mud to deal with. The sea was angry that day, my friends, but neither Pat nor I would back down from such a challenge.

Onto the next man challenge - Kidnapping a bear cub

Heed the Dub

Hit Counter

I won the battle of wills.

The Internet thought it could defeat me and failed. Score 1 for the blogging idiot.

Monday, March 29, 2010


The Hardy boys were wise beyond their years.

Heed the Dub

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Hot Tub Time Machine

Many of the beloved comedies of the 80s starred John Cusack. He has arguably more memorable scenes from that decade than any other actor. John Cusack and the 80s just go together. So it is a real treat to be able to see him once again on his home turf surrounded by all the gimmicks of that hyper colored era. He basks in it. And there are also more than a few winks to his early career, the most notably being Sixteen Candles where, this time, he gets to be the leading man.

The other additions to his crew of misbehaving time traveling scene stealers are Rob Corddry, Craig Robinson, and Clark Duke. Corddry and Robinson are both hilarious. Duke gets in a few great one-liners, but he is relegated to the one character trying the hardest to get back to the present. Crispin Glover also takes his career full circle playing a bellhop in the present and in the past much reminiscent of his Back to the Future role.

Finally, I give this film a lot of credit for its setup. The whole reason behind why the four friends head off to Kodiak Lodge in the first place is as believable as it is convenient.

Hot Tub Time Machine is a really funny movie that explores what happens when the characters need to repeat the faults of their pasts in order to get back to the present even if they don't really want to.

Heed the Dub

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day

Is it possible for a movie to be both homoerotic and homophobic at the same time? Not as cool as the original. This installment really misses Willem Dafoe. Julie Benz does her best to fill his shoes and she's much easier on the eyes, but the scenes with the police investigating the killings fall flat. Also, the amount of gay jokes and insults is extensive and ultimately overkill.

In the end, if you loved the original film seeing this one won't detract from it too much. If you just thought the original was okay, you might want to consider checking out The Blind Side instead.

Heed the Dub

Executive Order # 2

I realize that there are many young'ins who have access to this awesome anti-blog of mine (i.e. little cousins, neighbors, D-Man) so I will refrain from using any cuss words. As we all know George Carlin had 7 Dirty Words you can't use on TV. I'm going the extra mile.

F word = eff
S word = poop
P word = cooter
D word = weiner
B word = itch
AH word = aye whole
BS word = fib
C word = coot

More to come...

Heed the Dub

Wednesday, March 24, 2010


What the hell is the hit counter called? I'm going nuts because I feel like an stupid idiot moron looking for the thingy that keeps track of how many people visit this damn site-- AND I KNOW NO ONE HAS YET-- so all it would have on it is about seven zeroes in a row

Heed the Dub

St. Pat's done RIGHT!

This is about half of the people that were there at 226 Madison. BEST St. Pat's Day Ever

If you were there see if you can find yourself. This is 2007.

It is like a green game of Where's Waldo? and I love the look-alike game.
I'm not in this picture because I am on the other side of the beer pong table but you can find at least 2 Dub look-alikes.

Many came over that day, few remember

Heed the Dub

Rage Against the Mouse


We have began the uphill battle to win back our domain. It, as you all
know, has been invaded by the Microtus pennsylvanicus, more commonly known as the field mouse or pocket mouse. The perimeter has been set. The hunting ground is the kitchen / dining room. We have acquired an assortment of traps, ranging from humane to very much inhumane. We do not have to worry about this because it is a damn mouse and not human at all. Human law, therefor, does not apply.

As we all know, pocket mice travel on all four limbs along the ground, as opposed to hopping like their relative, the kangaroo mice. Pocket mice are nocturnal and usually solitary. This bodes well for us, however, two of these supposed pocket mice have been spotted cavorting together late at night in the kitchen. It is my belief we are dealing with a rogue mouse. One set on slowly and methodically wearing us down.

After the first night of hunting, no carcass was recovered. There is hope that Felix, as he has come to be known, fed off the poison cubes and will appear in the fetal position and experiencing Riga mortise. This is only day one of the war ahead. We are in for the long haul. There is no backing down to this rodent. He will be brought to justice and an untimely death. I fully expect to return to the apartment this evening to find him twitching in pain, or attempting to chew off his own feet as he is glued to the trap.

Godspeed gentlemen. I will see you on the field of battle.

Mouse Hunter

Heede the Dub

Blogging Virgin Alert!

So blogs. Yea. I don't see what all the hub bubbing is about. This is easy.

I kick blogging ass right now. Seriously, this is cake.

Anywho, this blog will not be known as a blog. Executive order #1- This is an anti-blog, and from this moment it will be deemed as such. Read on at your own risk. There might be some humor here in the future so check it out.

This already sucks so I'm out.

Stay tuned.

Heed the Dub